Kidney donation: 'Giving a stranger this gift has changed my life'

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Every year, a small number of people decide to donate a kidney to a stranger.

Last year, about 1,000 people in the UK gave a kidney to a family member or friend, while 83 donated one to somebody they did not know. Teacher Laura Maisey, 38, from Chelmsford, is one of these so-called altruistic kidney donors.

Here, in her own words, she explained why giving away one of her organs changed her life.

‘I was wondering if you’d like one of my kidneys’

I started thinking about how I could help other people when I ran from Rome to London, in September 2016. During that journey, which took me 73 days, I received so much kindness from strangers and I wanted to return the favour.

My running friend Alice told me that she was donating her kidney to a stranger the following year. You can survive with just one so she didn’t see any reason not to donate the other. That made total sense to me.

People kept saying it was a crazy thing to do, or that it was too dangerous, or that they would be too scared. Not everyone’s brains work like mine, I realised, so not many people must be doing this, which made me more determined to help.

An artistic rendering of an x-ray showing two kidneys

However, I moved to Italy for 18 months so I put the idea aside. Just before I was due to return, my diabetic cousin’s kidneys began to fail. I couldn’t help her because she needed both a kidney and a pancreas from a deceased donor. I knew I wanted to make someone better, like my cousin, who received a successful transplant, and I wanted to thank the world.

After coming back to live in the UK, I had to go to London for something and found myself near Guy’s and St Thomas’ hospital, where my friend Alice had donated her kidney all that time ago. I walked through the main doors and headed to the kidney department. “I was wondering if you’d like one of my kidneys,” I said to the receptionist.

Three months and lots of tests later, I was approved to donate. I’m vegan, I hardly drink and I’m fairly active so I was sure my little kidney could do a good job for someone. But Covid struck and my plans were kicked to the curb. All elective surgery was cancelled. I waited until September 2020 and contacted the hospital, and luckily the kidney donor programme was starting up again.

‘I was so happy to know a stranger had been for a wee’

A few months later, I got a phone call to say a match had been found and my operation would be in January. I can honestly say I was so excited. The only wobble I had was when they said I would have to isolate with my partner for Christmas Day to make sure I didn’t catch Covid.

My dad messaged me the night before the surgery to say he was scared for me and didn’t want me to do it, but my mind was made up. It’s a weird concept going in to hospital for doctors to make you intentionally ill but I couldn’t wait.

The morning arrived and the surgeons came to my room to check I still wanted to do it. It was the most certain “yes” I have ever said in my life. On the way down to the operating theatre I was totally buzzing. My kidney physically left my body at midday and started its journey to its recipient.

I was told the next morning that my kidney had transplanted well, the recipient was urinating successfully and all the numbers that represent good kidney function were looking as they should. I have never been so happy to know that a stranger had been for a wee!

I was in hospital for three days, sat on the sofa for one more, then got back to normal life. I know some people have a longer recovery but I felt fine again really quickly.

A month later the hospital got an email from Stuart, the person who received my kidney. “Hi, I’m the guy who has got your kidney,” it said.

You are told that whoever you donate to might not get in contact, so I wasn’t expecting to hear from him but I was so happy that he was doing so well.

We wrote a lot and got to know each other, I was fascinated to hear all about his life. My husband and I went down to meet him in Folkestone, where he was living with his wife, and we went for a swim in the sea and drank Champagne. We got on so well, it was incredible.

I would have been happy for anyone to get my kidney, but it was the cherry on the top that it went to the nicest person and now we are good friends.

In October, I ran the York marathon and Stuart came to support me and he met my dad, who now completely understands why I gave my kidney away.

It is easily the best thing that has ever happened to me and I can honestly say it has changed my life. There are very few times that you get the chance to make an actual difference to someone. At some point I’m not going to exist and the things I leave behind need to be positive. It feels important that I have left something good in the world.

Stuart, who received Laura’s kidney, says:

I was 43 when I received Laura’s kidney but I had known I would need a transplant from the age of 20, when I was diagnosed with polycystic kidney disease. I was very seriously ill before the operation and was about to go on dialysis.

My kidney function is now very good, which is amazing really because I’m a big man and Laura is very slight, so her kidney is working very hard.

Laura had to drink a lot of water before the operation so I was given this water-laden kidney. It is mind blowing to think that I urinated that out!

I knew I wanted to write to Laura but I struggled to work out what to say. What Laura did for me was the most incredible and beautiful thing. There are no words to sum up how grateful I am.

Laura is such a great human being, she didn’t want me to thank her, she was just trying to give back to the universe. We have this bond for life now and I am lucky to have her as a friend.

As told to Charlie Jones